At The Foot of The Cross

At the Foot of the Cross

I find myself wandering in the darkness searching for hope, peace, and answers. Not being able to see the way I stretch my arms out to feel where I am going.  With my arms stretched out in front of me I feel something.  As I continue to feel the object a ray of sun shines down on it to reveal what it is.  As my eyes focus I see a wondrous cross before me.  I stand amazed at the sight.  There is quite all around.  Not a sound can be heard.  The silence like a cold knife penetrates my heart.  I feel sorrow and regret for times past.  I begin to weep from the depths of my soul. With my head bowed down in shame I stand at the foot of the cross so desperate for God.  My tears flow deep.  There is no where else to turn.  At the foot of the cross I am in the presence of love, but my heart feels bound and alone.  I have been wandering around searching for somewhere to belong and for someone to love me for so long.  The sky is dark and still the only light to be seen is that of the one ray of sun shinning upon the cross.  Only a cold breeze can be felt as it softly brushes across my face drying my tears as they fall.  I shiver trying to stay warm. As I continue to stand before the cross I cry out “God where are you.” As I cry out I fall to my knees and plead to God. “Dear God, hear my cries, forgive me, and please come to my rescue.  Please save me from myself and this cruel world. I can’t do it by myself.”  As I cry I hear thunder and see flashes of light that light up the sky as the lightning cracks the darkness. The sky opens up and the rain pours down covering the dry and crumbling ground. The drops of rain are quickly absorbed by the once thirsty lifeless ground.  I continue to plea and cry out to God.  Laying face first on the ground I am tired and weak and feel as if I can’t go on.  The rain stops and I begin to feel warmth upon my back.  I lift my head and feel the warmth from the sun on my face. There are now two rays of sunlight, one still shining on the cross and now one shining on me. I pull myself up and try to dry my eyes.  As I stand at the foot of the cross I begin to feel Gods presence.  The warmth of the sun starts to warm my cold and lonely heart.  So tired from crying I whisper “God is that You?”  I hear a loving, tender voice faint but strong say “yes my daughter it is I, your Lord and Savior.  I am here.  I have always been here waiting for you to come home.  I am so happy that you made it here.  I have missed you so.”  I begin to cry again and say “God I am so sorry for taking so long to come home and for the life I once lived. Please dear God, forgive me.”  I than hear him say “Oh my child I already have.  Look up and see what stands before you.  There stands the cross I carried, bleed, and died on.  That moment I said it was finished, it was finished.  You and all who choose to believe in me were forgiven and were given a new life filled with hope and a promise that we would never be apart.”  A love like I never felt swells in my heart.  The sky begins to clear and a beautiful valley appears as the ground sparks life as flowers bloom where once there was darkness.  Brilliant colors fill the sky.  Now a warm breeze blows across the field making the branches and flowers dance in the love of and presence of the Lord.  Peace and love fill my heart. My heart is now alive as it beats with new hope and passion.  As I bask in the love of Christ He tells me to share His love with others and let them know with Him there is hope.  He tells me to stay strong and reminds me that He is always with me and that we will never be apart.  He is all I need.  His love fills my heart and gives my soul life.  Not just breath to breathe, but a life worth living.

Trish Iiams