Hello 2016

Hello 2016

     Yesterday, I ran to the store to get a few things and there were so many people doing the same thing. As I was checking out I was lucky to get one of my favorite checkers. She has gone through so much, but always has a smile on her face and never a negative thing to say. In line we started talking about the year we had and how quickly it seemed to go by. A couple months prior I had bought a gift card to give to her. For my anniversary someone gave me a gift card to the Cheesecake Factory and I enjoyed it, so I thought I would pay it forward to someone else. I didn’t know that she had just lost someone very close to her and they were going to go to his funeral later and afterwards they were planning to go out for some dessert. I handed her the gift card and she was very thankful. I didn’t realize it until after she walked away and my daughter Sarah said, “Mom that’s funny, we gave her a gift card to the Cheesecake Factory and she was buying cheesecake,”
    
     Anyway, back to standing in line talking to her. She shared how she had lost both her dad and her Uncle to various causes, and lost three teenagers in the family due to suicide. She said that you have to love yourself and I said that I was so sorry for such loss. I also said that suicide just gives your pain to someone else and she just kept saying, so true. This broke my heart and I told her that I would pray for healing for her family. We talked a bit more as she finished checking my groceries, but she had a line of people to check out, so we said our goodbyes.


     Today is the first year of 2016 and a chance to start new. True, but in some ways this isn’t the case. Though the circumstances we may not have any control of; however, we can control our outlook. Every year I find a word that I want to represent what I want to do or change in the coming year instead of a New Year’s Resolution. I have not found my word yet, but have several that I have been throwing around. I want my word to represent change, action, and my attitude. I also want the word to represent solid results and no more sitting on the sidelines just hoping for things to be accomplished. Most of all I want to be a testimony of God’s love to others. I want to be the change. Maybe, my word should be change?


     This coming year will be full of change with all my children growing up. My son J.J. will be going off to college and yet again the dynamics of our home will be effected. I have been working on so many goals that I need to accomplish, so in many aspects I need things to change. I have some of my own actions I need to work on, so again I need change. I see many hurting and in need of change, so why couldn’t I be the change they are looking for? I’m not saying I can change their situation, but I can be a light of compassion to them. I want to make a difference in this world; I want to be a positive change in this not so caring world. If anything I want to be the light of Christ. Which brings me to another thing I need to change, and that is the time I spend with my Lord and Savior. He is the only one who can give me all I need to face this coming year and get over some things from this past year, and beyond.
     
     So, here I am the first day of the New Yew and I am going to step out in faith and say that if you don’t know God as your personal Savior than my prayer for you is that you will seek Him. He said that if you seek Him you shall find Him. He is my source of all hope and can be yours too.
I want to take the time to thank all of you who have in anyway shown me kindness, have prayed for me, and have challenged me. I pray that this New Year will be one of healing, success, and blessing to you all. I also want to say that if I have offended anyone or failed you in any way, I am sorry. If there is anything I can pray for you for this year, please let me know and I will add you to my prayers. May God bless you and keep you close always.

Love, Trish Iiams

Along Life's Road

 

Along life’s road there will be joy and tears.  Laughter and fear.  Along life’s road storms will come and go.  There will highs and lows.  Along life’s road I will find roses and thorns and when life seems to be so bleak He will be the one I seek.  Along life’s road I will walk many miles up steep mountains and through quite meadows so sweet.  I will cross hot desert sands and face oceans so deep and wide.  The best part is God sees me no matter where I try to hide.  The journey is long and at times the valleys seem to never end.  I will fall along the way and get hurt but it is God’s love that mends.  Along life’s road I will come to cliffs so treacherous and rivers flowing so swift that I wonder how will I ever make it to the other side.  Then God reminds me that He is my guide.  The cold winds will blow and the hot sun will beat me down.  There will be vast forest where the haunting silence is the only sound that can be found.  No matter where I go I will never have to walk alone because of the love God has shown.  It is a comfort to know that when life’s road becomes dreary I know that my God is always near me.  All I need to do is have a little faith and trust that God will give me the strength it takes.  God knows my heart and the journey I am about to embark.  God is the one who gives me a new start.  Jesus is right beside me every step I take.  Along Life’s road there will be times I feel as if I will break.  But no matter what it takes God will make a way and He is there to stay.  The nights may be long but the morning will come even if things look so glum.  I may be far from home and feel lost and alone but I will look to God’s love to find my way.  I will never forget God’s love is here to stay.  He will be found on every road, every path, and with me every step I take.  I will remember God never makes mistakes.  Along life’s road there will be lessons to learn, even when the hot winds burns as the winding roads turn.  God is there showing me the way through the cold dark nights and through the bright blinding sun of the day.  Again, I will never forget that no matter where I go I will never walk alone.  He is found on every trail and in every star that shines even if it’s faint.  He is in the thunder and lightning that lights up the landscapes He paints.  Jesus knows my joys, sees every struggle, and catches every tear that falls.  He knows my heartaches, my dreams, and is there when I call.  He is there to give me strength and to walk with me the lengths.  He will walk with me the distance even though my heart will fail.  He never grows weary and times He will have to carry me along trail. He has promised to never leave me or forsake me and He will make my pathway clear. He will lead me and guide me and I will no longer have a reason to fear.  No matter where I find myself along life’s road He is there.  He hears, He sees, He knows, He answers, and He cares.

 

Trish Iiams 2/3/2015

The Word for 2015



I made a decision a few years ago to stop making New Year’s resolutions. Every time I did I would end up falling short and would be hard on myself. I have decide instead of making a resolution I would choose a word for the year. The word would represent what I wanted to work on in my life or a way I want to live. Last year was Focus. The reason I chose “Focus” was in this chaotic world it is easy to lose focus or focus on things that just take away joy or distract one from what is really important. I wanted to focus on growing my faith and what God wants me to accomplish and not my will. The year before that was the word “Fearless.” All my life I struggled with fear. Fear of rejection, failure, stepping out in faith and doing something new….. So I decided that I was going to live fearlessly in all I did, especially in my faith. That I wasn’t going to continue to sit on the sideline watching the world go by. I can’t say that I have come to live a completely fearless life, but I have made changes to be fearless in my faith.
This year I struggled to find a word for the year. It seems like my life has been falling apart and I having been running around worrying about fixing everything. I always find myself trying to fix things on my own and find myself being consumed with worry. Worry at times become crippling and steals the joy out of my life. This past week and a half I have been out of commission with my leg hurt and I have had to depend on the help of my children and family to get things done. I have had to let go of control and trust others with task that I couldn’t do myself. For those who know me it is hard for me to accept help. I am the type that would rather do for others.
Many words came to my mind that I thought I could use for my word for the year like Trust, Faith, Truth, Joy and Finish….. After thinking about it I came up with “NO.” What I mean by “NO” is No more excuses, No more fear, No more worry, No more procrastination……. just NO.
For years I have battled with so many things and have so many things left undone. I always come up with excuses and I hate to admit it but I am always putting things off. I am tired of living a life where I feel like I am in limbo and just waiting for things to get done. I am tired of worrying about the outcome and just waiting for things to fall into place. This year is a year for action and to get things done. “NO” more waiting and “NO” more just getting by.
As well as saying “NO” more to things that bring me down or hold me back “NO” stands for standing firm to what is true, what is good and what is righteous. This world is full of lies and compromise so along with saying “NO” to better myself I will say “NO” to what goes against my core beliefs and “NO” to compromise. I will have to stand firm even if it’s not popular and say “NO” to what others think of me. Life is too short to fill it full of worry.
I know in order to accomplish my long to do list I will have to say “NO” to my excuses, fear, worry and say “NO” to the what ifs, the unknown, and let go of the what could have been. With this I have to trust and have faith. I believe in by saying “NO” I will get the joy back in my life.
With all that said I choose the word “NO.”
Resolutions are temporary but a heart changed is permanent.
May God truly bless you this year.

January 1, 2015

January 1, 2015.  The first day of 2015 a new page to another chapter in my life.  As many I too have reflected on this past year.  2014 went by so fast.  Don’t get me wrong there were moments in 2014 that seemed like they would never end.  It was a year for new experiences, new friends and yes new trials.  This past year was a heavy one it came with many ups and a lot of downs.  2014 I struggled with finding myself and coming to terms with things of the past that I could and will never be able to change.  I faced many decisions where I had to really focus on what was really important.  I failed many times but managed to win a few rounds.  I did some things that I am not so proud of and yet made accomplishments that surprised myself.  Through trial and error I have come to know myself better and to come to know of a God that is just, yet so loving and patient.  My entire life I have lived in the shadows of who God wants me to be.  I have been so afraid to take chances and to give up control.  The silly thing is I never really had control any way.  I know that January 1, 2015 is just another day and a beginning of a new year.  Last night was a night to reflect and to celebrate but today is a new beginning, a new chance to make good, and a chance to let go. 

As everyone else in the house are still asleep and the house is silent.  All I can hear is the ticking of the clock in the background and the hum of the refrigerator.  It is amazing where your mind can go when it is silent and there are no distractions.  Though I am tired I feel encouraged.  I made it through another year and have another chance to make a difference.  Yesterday I was a bit down and my heart hurt for those who were hurting.  Also I was feeling inadequate and was questioning if I had made a difference in anyone’s life.  Today I am wondering how to move forward with this New Year.  I already know that there are some difficult decisions just around the corner and big changes to our family.  I do know one thing and that is as long as I have God in my life I will be able to face whatever may come my way.  Life isn’t easy and God never said it would be but with Him it is worth it.

My greatest desire besides having everyone come to know God as their personal Savior is to be able to be a light in the dark world and make a difference. God has been calling me to action and to complete some tasks and every year I make excuses and put them off.  My word for the year is “NO” which stands for NO more excuses and NO more fear.  This is a year for action and change. As I look to this New Year I am hopeful yet combobled of how to approach it and what plan of action do I take. Regardless action and change are necessary. 

“Dear God let me be able to focus on You and be able to say “NO” to the distractions of the world and the fear of the unknown that keeps me from moving forward. Please help me let go of the “what ifs” and the “what could have been” and just trust that You know what the future holds and that You hold it.  Please let me be light in this dark world and make a difference.  Thank you for allowing me to face another year and thank You for all You have given me and done for me.  Dear Father please be with those who are hurting and comfort them.  Dear God I pray that if there is anyone that does not trust in Your name and doesn’t know You that they will be able to.  Thank You again and for all the answered and unanswered prayers.”

There is Always Hope

This morning I made two strangers cry. The first person was at Starbucks where I was to meet up with my friend Amy and Tara. I went to get in line when a man walked up in front of me. He noticed that he cut in front of me and said sorry I didn’t mean to cut and motioned for me to move forward. I replied no that’s fine go ahead. He insisted so I did. I said thank you and asked him how he was. He said “so far today was good.” You could tell that his words did not match the expression on his face. I ended up saying, “well then I guess you’re off to a good start, but I believed that his day could only get better.” He laughed and then asked me if I was on my way to work? I said well, “I’m a Realtor and I am off to find new clients, but things have been hard.” I laughed and asked him if he wanted a card and he said yes.

For some reason Starbucks was extra busy this morning so things were taking a little longer than usual. So to fill time we continued to talk. He started sharing about his life and asked me if there was any hope for him to buy a house being that he had to file bankruptcy? I of course said yes that there is always hope and shared with him the time line and things to do to rebuild his credit. At this point he had tears in his eyes. He started to tell me that he had to file bankruptcy due to medical bills for his son. His son had to have an emergency surgery to save his life, but being that it was in an out of network hospital the cost were great. I told him that I thought he was a good father and said that I would pray for him. At this point he was definitely in tears. I told him how in times of trouble we may not be able to control our circumstances but we can control our outlook. I shared my heart and he started to smile. I joked saying see the day is already looking better. By this time our drinks were ready so we would part ways. He grabbed me and gave me a big hug, said thank you and walked away smiling. About that time one of my friends showed up. My friends and I talked for a while which was just what I needed. They always have a way of making me smile.

I had to run to FedEx to fax something and as I sat down to the computer to look up something this lady sat down at the computer next to me and asked me if I do Christmas cards and I said usually I do but haven’t this year. She looked really sad and worried. She started telling me that she had to postpone her surgery until January. I told her that I was sorry she was going to have to have surgery. I asked her if she didn’t mind if she could share what she had to have surgery for and she said to get a cancerous lump out of her breast. I told her that I was sorry and how scary of a time this must be for her but I believe that she is going to be ok. I asked her name and asked if I could add her to my prayer list. Without hesitation she said yes please do and I said done. She asked me what church I went to and what affiliation I was so I told her and she smiled. She then asked me to look at her Christmas card that she designed and asked me if it looked good, so I did. I told her it was prefect. I saw she had grandbabies so I shared with her that 6 months ago my daughter Shannon had my first grandchild, my grandson David. We talked about our families and we both smiled at the thought of them. Her eyes started to fill with tears and I told her to look at me and she did. I grabbed her hand and looked her right in the eyes and told her I know it is hard but don’t let worry get the best of her and that I knew that she would make it through this healthy!! I told her that it sounds like they caught it early and that I just knew everything was going to be ok. I shared with her my Breast Cancer scares and told her that she is not alone. I than took out my business card and handed it to her. I told her that I wasn’t trying to sell her anything but I wanted her to be able to have someone to talk to if she needed to. At this point she was really crying and reached in her purse and handed me her card as well. She asked me if my email was on my card so she could send me her Christmas card. I told her it was. At this point she was done with what she had to do and got up to leave. She took a couple steps away as she was wishing me well and turned back around came over grabbed me and gave me one of the biggest hugs I have ever had. She said thank you and I told to remember that she is not alone and that there is always hope.

Everyone in this world needs hope and someone to care. It doesn’t cost anything but time to listen to someone. If you ask me it is time well spent. It seems like everywhere I turn I run into people desperate for hope. People everywhere are feeling alone. Trust me I know life can get very busy and overwhelming. But what I am seeing is hope is contagious. All it takes is just a little faith and maybe for someone just to care and listen. If you are going through a difficult time right now I want you to know that there is hope and that everything will be ok. I want to encourage you to reach out to someone, give a listening ear and give them a gift of hope. As I said it doesn’t cost anything but maybe a smile.

I am so grateful that God is my reason to have hope because I know that He has promised me that He will never leave us or forsake us. Because of the love He has for us and for the cross we all can have hope. So my prayer is that if you don’t know God as your personal Savior then please seek Him and trust me He will meet you where you are. Your life doesn’t have to be prefect, you don’t have to have everything figured out, and guess what you are never far too gone for His love. He loves you for who you are and desires to have a relationship with you. He will be there for you no matter what and can turn our ashes into something so beautiful and all you have to do is put your trust in Him. With God nothing is impossible and He is and always will be our hope.

Prejudice

I know what I am about to say will stir emotions and I’m sure there may be harsh words said back. However, I feel the need to somehow bridge a gap of understanding. The topic is on prejudice and hate crimes because of it. Please don’t get me wrong when I say this because I do not mean any disrespect of any kind. Being white I will never fully understand completely what Blacks face. Growing up I came face to face with what prejudice looks like being one of the few white kids in my neighborhood. I was teased, beat and harsh words were said to me because of the color of my skin. I am not playing victim just saying what it was like for me. I was taught to love and respect everyone regardless of race and religion. That respect was not given back by many. I grew to fear black men because of how I was treated. Over the years I have had a chance to meet black men who don’t hate and live a life of love. Their love for others replaced my fear with love for them. I have tried to teach my children that it is not the color of a person’s skin that is important but it is the character that they live by. I have made a point to live a life free from prejudice and hate. Those things are taught and we are not born with those thoughts and actions. My kids don’t see the difference in color and that makes me proud.
I have seen so many horrific acts of violence against the Blacks and this breaks my heart. Please forgive me for not speaking out on the matter and taking a stand against it. The issue is that as a white person how do you do that without coming across sounding racist, insensitive or that I know what it is like? I don’t agree with the hardships that the Blacks face and the acts of violence against them. My heart breaks and angers because of those things. There is an invisible line in the sand that separates the blacks from the whites and for the White people to take a stand without fear of coming across as being a racist. How do you cross that line and offer love and support against racism regardless where it comes from? Don’t get me wrong there are whites that are racist but I am not. Here is where the truth lies there is racism towards other races regardless the color of the skin.
Writing this I am not giving justice to where my heart is. I don’t want there to be a separation and won’t stand for hatred no matter where it comes from. I do not support it nor will I ever. I know I will never completely understand because the fact that I can’t; I don’t come from the same culture, but I know I can try. With that said I have face racism towards myself and my family. I don’t want any person to have to deal with any form of prejudice ever. If I offended someone I am sorry that was not my intent. This world needs all cultures to come together in love and understanding. Please help me fill in the gap. That gap starts with me taking a stand against racism not only for myself but for my family by teaching my children to love not hate.
Everyday especially lately I see some sort of racial comments going back and forth between the Blacks and Whites. This sickens me. Why do we continue to hate and why do we want to put blame on others. This has been going on way too long and needs to stop. I don’t want my children to face the same hatred that was shown to me and don’t want them to harbor any hate in their own hearts. My youngest and I were watching Hair Spray last night and she came to me in tears. I asked her why she was crying and she said that it was sad how people were treating each other and that she was glad that she wasn’t born then. I asked her why and she said because the black and white people didn’t get along back then and that she is happy because she can be friends with kids that are black. She then asked “mom why did people make a big deal about people being different colors, aren’t we all people?” From the mouth of my daughter Sarah “Aren’t we all people?” I told her that people didn’t understand that back then and some people still don’t understand that there is no difference today. I told her that racism is a choice and that I was proud of her for not having hate in her heart. She then asked me “why do people choose hate mom, why can’t everyone love one another because of who they are and not because of what they look like.” Let me ask the same question to everyone who chooses hate over love, why?
Parents please teach your children to love and not hate. For those who harbor hate stop it. You are not better than someone else because the color of your skin. Take pride in your heritage and respect others and theirs. This is not an issue between Black and White, this is an issue of hatred towards another person because of choice. It is time to come together in love and embrace the differences and thank one another for bringing a different culture and perspective to the world.

My Goliath

It is amazing the things you do to protect the ones you love.  I remember the year 2000 my younger brother Matthew and I decided to go dancing to bring in the New Year.  I don’t remember the name of the place I just know it had several levels and had a 70’s theme or something like that.  Anyway, we started dancing and this woman comes up and starts hanging all over my brother and flirting with him.  I notice that she kept looking in the direction of this really built guy.  He was huge. He had to be over 6ft with muscles coming out of his muscles.  Let’s just say he was very intimidating.  Well this woman obviously was trying to make him jealous.  She preceded to try to kiss my brother. My brother of course seeing what she was trying to do kept trying to push her away.  Needless to say she succeeded and before you know it this man starts charging Matthew.  He grabs my brother’s shirt and without a thought I go running up to this guy.  As I was running I jumped up leading with my elbow and hit this man across the face with my elbow and then I jump on his back hitting him and yelling for him to leave my brother alone.  At this point he starts saying “ok ok ok I will leave him alone.”  The security guards come over and pull me off this man’s back.  One of them pulls me aside and asked “didn’t you see the size of that man, he could have crushed you?”  Then the other security guard said that he didn’t even want to have to comfort him.  I quickly said that he was going to hurt my brother.  The big muscle guy’s girlfriend runs up to him and starts to take care of him, I think I might have broken his nose. The couple walk off and the big guy says “sorry I didn’t know he was your brother.”  I was proud of myself thinking that I saved my brother and that he would be happy that I did, but I was wrong.  Matthew said to me “how could you do that you’re my sister and I don’t need my sister fighting for my fights.” I guess I embarrassed him so he had to prove a point and meet up this man later and beat him up.  I kinda felt sorry for this guy, I mean it was his girlfriend who was starting all problems. Despite my brother was upset with me I learned something about myself that night and that was when it comes down to defending someone I love I would do it regardless of the obstacle.  I call this my David and Goliath story.  

My younger brother is no longer with us. In August it will be 4yrs since he passed away. As August is approaching Matthew has been on my mind a lot.  He was a fighter and fought for those who couldn’t help themselves.   In honor of my brother I want to pass it forward for the month of August.  August 18^th would have been his 38th birthday, so my gift to him I will stand strong for what I believe and take on my fears and take on my Goliath.  I have been going through the motions lately and over the weekend I decided to start living more boldly and take chances, get out of my comfort zone, and make changes.  I challenge you to do the same thing.  What has been holding you back?  What are your fears? What do you need to change?  I have realized that life is too short and I want to live a life that makes a difference for others.  I want to be a light to those who don’t know Christ as their personal Savior.  I want to encourage others and let them know that they are not alone.  It only takes one pebble thrown in a pond to make endless ripples.  I want to be that pebble and you can too.